The Honesty Pact

Miscommunication and trust can be a great difficulty with long distance relationships. What your partner is doing, what they meant by a certain text or particular Facebook status can send your mind reeling into questioning doubts and anxieties. The solution however, is simply you and your partner agreeing to be open and honest with one another. It’s difficult to trust, but if you’re open about your life with your partner, it makes it so much easier.

Make these promises to each other:

• If something bothers me, I will tell you and not be indirectly hostile or impolite.

• I will tell you when and where and with whom I socialise.

• I will not divulge anything about our relationship which you might be uncomfortable with.

• You can ask me anything.

It’s important not to avoid awkward conversations and hostility to grow between you. If something is making you uncomfortable – however trivial – discuss it. This way you are certain that if something is bothering your partner, they will tell you and not drop passive aggressive messages like bread crumbs hoping you’ll lead yourself to the problem. And you won’t have to look through meanings in text messages or Facebook statuses.

Talk about your friends, what you do and where you go. If you share these details nothing will seem clandestine and suspicious to your partner. And if you feel uncomfortable sharing something, perhaps it’s an indication that you shouldn’t be doing it. The more details you share the better, and offer them willingly. Tell your partner they can ask you anything anytime. If they know this, they don’t need to feel uncomfortable when they do or worse yet, just keep it to themselves and let the issue fester.


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